February 27, 2010


Husband:  I think you'll make a wonderful mother.
Sarah:  You do?
Husband:  Yes, and so does everyone else on the internet. Then again, everyone on the internet thinks Ron Paul would make a good president so...we'll see.

My husband is getting impatient.  He wants to hold her and be with her.  Me, I just feel nervous.  I have begun to get frightened of the pain.  I am in a cranky mood and want to be simultaneously left alone and completely taken care of.  I hurt a lot of the time.  I want the hurt to turn into labor, so I try to stoke it.  But it doesn't; it's just pointless pain.

I am not nesting so much as freaking out that I have wasted the past eight years of married life.  Why didn't I clean the garage or finish that quilt or sort through worthless old college textbooks?  What if today is the day and I still haven't gotten the oil changed in my car?

I don't feel like a good mom.  I feel like I'm already starting out on the wrong foot.

Posted by: Sarah at 09:17 AM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
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1 it is totally normal to panic and worry!  If it makes you feel any better, you'll probably spend a good amount of time once she's here in panic and worry mode about all kinds of things....maybe that doesn't help!

Posted by: sharona at February 27, 2010 09:55 AM (BeRta)


Don't worry!  Your ducks are in a row.  You and the babe are more important now.  Chores and projects can wait!  Try to enjoy these last days of having a baby without all the work at the moment...do you get what I mean?

As far as labor goes you can handle it.  Have hubby remind you that there is a very wonderful result of this labor.  (hint: hubby, encourage but don't be too pollyannish! pick your moments,you'll get what I mean.)

Last but not least do what is good and right for you and don't listen too much to all of us.  Not everyone has 80 hour labors!  They just like to tell stories, kinda like fish stories. I liked the shower and I had a rocking chair in the room that I spent most of my time in.  You will know what you need when you need it.

Eat you favorite things, read a good book, watch Dick Van Dyke reruns whatever...enjoy.

cindy h.

Posted by: cindy h at February 27, 2010 10:14 AM (gcBP7)

3 Ian arrived so quickly that the phrase "muzzle velocity" was bandied about. No drugs, not TOO much pain (she says). Sometimes it's easy. Sig

Posted by: Sig at February 27, 2010 02:58 PM (/Mv9b)

4 You got all the important stuff done already.  It's fine.  I promise.  The rest of it will all get done one day.  You can always assign those jobs to people who come over and ask you what you need help with,  And labor, honestly, it's different for everyone, but you'll handle any pain that comes your way.  I promise, none of it will matter to you in the long run.  

Posted by: Ann M. at February 27, 2010 05:28 PM (+GQ3g)

5 Honestly, I think you're right where you need to be.  Life isn't life without "what ifs" and second guessing.  I believe it's what gives us our second nature.  4 hours before we were supposed to leave for China to bring Olivia home, I had not yet been to bed, was blogging and then finished packing. 

You're going to be a fantastic mom...the internets will back me on this one.

Posted by: Susan at February 27, 2010 09:07 PM (URuXw)


Heh... Ron Paul works his way into a parenting conversation. Sweet.

On the chores note, you'll be asking yourself, "why did I think I was so busy back ___?" for the next few decades... so no worries.   Gotta leave something home-chore-ish for you to do with her!   Kids LOVE to help (especially when they're little)!

FWIW, I had an OB PA (who's had kids) tell me that if I could handle those "clean it out now" tablets, I can definitely handle labor.  I haven't been through anything to test that hypothesis yet, but I like to believe her.   You'll do great. 

Posted by: Krista at February 27, 2010 10:58 PM (sUTgZ)

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