March 28, 2005
I'm still subbing, and it's funny how I view things through the eyes of a teacher now. The husband and I have been watching the series Freaks and Geeks, and I can't help but see pieces of my own 7th graders in the show's characters. I am very sensitive about the geeks and very hateful towards the freaks, simply because I now see those interactions in front of my eyes every day.
I haven't given up on blogging. My mom says she misses me, but it's really because of our computer. I haven't even read a single blog in over a week. I hope to be back in the saddle soon.
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March 24, 2005
We're doing OK. We've been talking a lot about how we felt during the deployment, all the stuff that went unsaid when we only had the instant messenger to convey our thoughts. Puzzle pieces are falling into place, and we're working through the usch.
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March 23, 2005
Last night I had a dream that my husband made the move to Finance and they deployed him to Spain for six weeks. Nevermind that this makes no sense; I was still devastated. In my dream I kept arguing that we were still under stop-move and he couldn't leave again. I guess even though it's rough reintegrating, I'd rather have him home than in Spain.
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06:20 AM
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March 22, 2005
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March 15, 2005
Also last night he and I were talking about all the myths that people throw around: all soldiers are poor, all Republicans are racists, etc. Today, thanks to RWN, I find a good article debunking the men-make-more-than-women myth.
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04:52 AM
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March 11, 2005
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March 09, 2005
Yesterday I wrote how proud I am of my husband, but last night he made me even prouder. He hadn't slept in two days, he hadn't eaten dinner or gotten any lovin', but the first thing he wanted to do was check on his soldiers. We spent our first hour together in the barracks, passing out bottles of beer and introducing me to his guys. I am so proud that he put them first.
And though you told me to stay away, you know I won't resist the blogging temptation for long...
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05:15 AM
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March 08, 2005
I also want to thank all of you who have been "deployed" along with me for an entire year. I appreciate all your support and good wishes. It means a lot to me to hear from all of you.
And now, I'm off!!!!
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March 07, 2005
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March 05, 2005
So the countdown for Return of the Husband is small enough to be counted on one hand. Hmm.
In a way, I feel a tiny bit nervous, to be honest. I can't quite put my finger on why. It will be a big change for both of us to be living together again after 13 months apart. He's gotten used to an enormous amount of sharing; I have shared virtually nothing for a year. He's been sleeping on a cot; I've been taking up the whole bed. He's been eating sub-standard food; I've been eating water chestnuts and carrot cake and all the delicious things that make him yak. My life has been so easy, and his has not.
I talked to The Girl the other night, and she told me how sorry she was that I had to wait so much longer than everyone else to get my husband home. I said that the real pity lies with the soldiers, that they have not done a single thing since 18 February and that I feel just awful that they're stuck so far from home. She laughed and said it was nice that I was thinking of the soldiers and not of myself, but how on earth can I complain about my feelings in comparison? Though I have complained this year about grading too many papers and getting paid too little, my life is a walk in the park. I know this. I couldn't possibly live with myself if I didn't acknowledge and respect how difficult my husband's life has been this year.
My husband is my favorite person in the whole world, so I can't figure out where the nerves are coming from. Perhaps I'm worried about wifeing him to death. Perhaps it just seems to good to be true that he'll be home in a few days. I don't know what it is that is making me so freaked out that this week has finally come.
Actually, I know what it is. It's the thought that I will have to leave him the day after he gets home and go wrestle with a bunch of 12 year olds. That's enough to make me sick to my stomach.
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I've not been sleeping well lately. My dreams are a mess of 7th graders and welcome home ceremonies. I have been told an arrival day for my husband next week, and I keep fretting about whether he's going to arrive during the school day. I managed to put myself in an extremely stressful situation a week before my husband returns from war. What a stupid move.
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March 03, 2005
I don't really hate them, but you know what I mean. I have a problem with wanting to be liked. I want my blog readers to like me. I want the students to like me. I want my husband's soldiers to like me. It's my character flaw that I want to be liked, because sometimes it's not good to be liked. Sometimes you have to be a jerk. My husband learned that lesson in Iraq, and I am learning it this week.
The students' grades are suffering too. They're talking instead of working, and therefore their work is sloppy and incomplete. Most of them got F's on their in-class assignment today. I don't know if the bad grades will force them to take notice, but I've certainly noticed when I look in the grade book.
Thank heavens their regular teacher is having twins: she is procreating double to make up for the child I'm rethinking wanting to have!
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10:56 AM
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And I think I can finally report that my husband is in Kuwait. I don't have any firsthand knowledge of his whereabouts, but his commander says that he's in Kuwait. So we're gonna assume he's finally there.
Time to pack my lunch...
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01:24 AM
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March 01, 2005
But really, other than that last class, it was fine. Except what is up with kids' names these days? The spellings are killing me: four girls named Kaitlyn, Caitlin, Katelynn, and Kaitland. My goodness. And how do you pronounce Mireya and Aryal? I thought I had it bad when most of my ESL students were Korean and Chinese!
I'm beat. Time for a little Simpsons with Red 6.
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12:11 PM
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