Oh, and my husband said that we probably better vote for Obama, because we both could use some Hope and Change. Heh.

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My mom and I went to my FRG picnic this weekend. One of the young wives cheerily asked my mom which soldier she was married to. We laughed and said that it wasn't entirely possible. The girl referenced Demi Moore.

Holy crap, she thought my mom was a cougar.
I nearly hyperventilated.

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Now this, this I will buy if I have a girl.

Also, I don't like those scrunchie things either, but I thought that was the socially acceptable thing to do. I'm glad you guys all say otherwise.

Posted by: Sarah at 06:39 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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Ruth emailed me and reminded me of the origin of my name, that Abraham's wife also had trouble conceiving.
She cracked me up.
Please Lord, do not make me wait until I am 90 to have a baby.
Heh.

Posted by: Sarah at 08:42 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Because there has been absolutely no public demand for this whatsoever, I thought I'd liveblog Rambo II. Ahem, I mean Rambo: First Blood II.

They're gonna let Rambo out of prison to go find POWs. Now that's what I'm talkin' about.
Oh sweet, John Kreese is in it. No mercy.
Wait, he just takes photos of POW camps? Not cool. I imagine there will be little photo taking and lots of asskicking.
I think they made Rambo extra sweaty on purpose.
"What you choose to call hell, he calls home."
Oh niiiice, gratuitous bulging bicep close-ups while he sharpens his knife.
Danger in the air! He's cutting away his supplies! This is gonna be good.
He choked a snake. Take that, Jeff Corwin.
Aw, what's this? A chick? Come on. Don't mess up my action movie with chicks. Is this a kissing book?
"A quiet war, a war against the soldiers who were returning, the kind of war you don't win."
I knew it! Screw the photos; he's going in!
Those poor POWs, locked up and being tortured. How are they ever going to learn to be anti-war?
arrow to the head = sweet
oooh, RPG action
Oh man, I knew something was rotten in the state of Denmark with that Murdock guy. They're leaving Rambo to be captured!
The Vietcong plus Russians: could we get a better coalition of bad guys?
Oooh, Murdock, you're boned! Heh.
OK, maybe this chick isn't so bad. Plus now Rambo's shirt is gone.
Popcorn break.
Aaaah! It is a kissing book.
Oh snap. I totally did not see that coming. So much for the kissing.
Dang, I don't care if he's 5'1"; Stallone is ripped. Also he wrote Rocky in three days, so he rules.
That mud camouflage was awesome.
Pistol vs exploding bow and arrow. Rock n roll.
How awesome to strafe a POW camp. That embiggened my heart.
Uh oh. Those sneaky phucking Russians. Nice job, POW door gunner.
Crap. Blackhawk down.
OOOOOOHHHH. Kaboom. Nice fake, Rambo. Wicked.
Watch out, Murdock. Rambo's comin' for ya. I hope he puts that knife in your gut.
John Kreese gets it squaa in the nuts.
And Rambo shoots his gun in the air and says aaaaaah. How Hot Fuzz of him.
"I want for our country to love us as much as we love it." Hooah.

Apparently, this movie was called the worst movie of 1985. There's no accounting for some people's bad taste. Also Rocky IV came out that year, which means it was a pretty stellar year in my book.

Ha, well, I'm sure none of you care about this post, but I sure entertained myself doing it.

Posted by: Sarah at 02:48 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
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Oh my goodness, I just had a hilarious thought: my baby is Schroedinger's cat.
Wow, that really cheered me up.

(OK, so not really. Observation won't actually cause the baby to be alive or dead, but for now it really does seem like it's both.)

Posted by: Sarah at 11:03 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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I just got my first letter in the mail from my husband, sent from Kuwait. In it he compares something he heard in the SF community to a part of Jonah Goldberg's book. Gosh, I love that man.

UPDATE:

Speaking of Jonah Goldberg, he compares Obama and Reagan in a recent interview:

First of all, Ronald Reagan which at times does sound superficially like Barack Obama's: Reagan talked about a shining city on a hill, and all that kind of stuff and he had this wonderful rhetoric about patriotism and unity and all these kinds of things. And I'm sure you could find all sorts of other comparisons between Reagan's rhetoric and Obama's. But at the end of the day, Reagan was romanticizing not government but the glories and wonders of the American people and what they can do with God's gift of freedom. Which is an enormous distinction.

Reagan still believed that government wasn't the solution, it was the problem. And Obama's approach is the exact opposite of that. Reagan comes from the National Review tradition of believing that a virtuous, a truly virtuous society can only be the end-product of a free society. For virtue not freely chosen is not virtue as Frank Meyer might say. And Obama's whole shtick is that we must be unified and hopeful for what the government itself can do for us. Michelle Obama says Barack Obama is going to cure and heal our sickened souls. From my perspective, we have a Second Amendment precisely to keep governments who think they are in the soul-fixing business at bay.

I don't want the government to try and fix my soul. When Barack Obama has his door-knocking volunteers go around, they're instructed not to talk about issues but to talk about how they came to Obama in the same way that people talk about coming to Jesus. That scares me. And that's not Reaganesque. Reagan's whole approach-I think Obama's gift for oratory and for seeming like a decent and compelling personality that you'd want to know and you enjoy listening to, that kind of stuff is Reaganesque. His ability to read a script is Reaganesque and I think those comparisons are perfectly legitimate just as I think comparisons between Mike Huckabee and Reagan on that score-his ability to connect with people are fair. But in terms of philosophy, the last thing in the world that Reagan represented was the idea that we should sort of turn politics into this quasi-religious enterprise where a great leader using government can redeem the society and deliver us to some sort of utopian place where we all sort of have to work together, that's not Reaganesque. That's the opposite of Reaganism.

That's good squishy.

Posted by: Sarah at 09:25 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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The funniest thing happened today. My mother-in-law sent us a package. My husband was on the phone with her while I opened it up, and I looked in the plastic bag that was on top. I said, "Um...it's a dead bird." My husband said, "What? She says it's something knitted."

It seems the Hitler cat killed a bird, and they put it in a bag and out in the garage to dispose of. And somehow that bag got grabbed when she went to put bags in the package for padding. It was the funniest thing ever. I can now say my mother-in-law mailed me a dead animal. I think that is a riot. My new favorite story.

The unfunniest thing also happened today. My husband's deployment got moved forward. He leaves soon now.

Posted by: Sarah at 03:37 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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1 I'm sorry. Sooner out = Sooner back? Yes? Maybe? But prolly not. I wish I could fix it. And I don't know how to knit. That peach premie was the f*ing cutest thing ever, EVER!! I want to learn how to do stained glass, but I doubt that I have the time or the patience.... It could be fairly lucrative, I suppose. Do you ever sell your stuff versus give it away? Could I 'order' something from you and pay for it??? Please? And if I haven't told you lately, I *heart* you! I do. I love you and Cali and Erin. (No, I am NOT drinking! Well, maybe a little.) No, no I am not drinking!!! You guys are just too kewl.!.

Posted by: Allison at May 01, 2008 06:15 PM (0hDLC)

2 laughed about the bird - how ridiculous! (and yes, funny!) - sighed about the deployment. My brother leaves today. sigh again.

Posted by: prophet at May 02, 2008 08:22 AM (+EInj)

3 Im not sure what I would have done with a package and a dead animal....it is quite the story.... I'm sorry about the deployment date.....but once it begins, it will also begin the start of being able to put days behind you and closer to it being over....but it still sucks. ~ASW

Posted by: A Soldier's Wife at May 02, 2008 10:02 AM (oIINu)

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The husband and I just spent the last hour laughing hysterically at a website John Hawkins found: Stuff White People Like.

Ho
Ly
Crap

This is the most hilarious blog ever. It covers all the stuff I freaking hate (note: travelling / study abroad and making you feel bad about not going outside are just better-written versions of my hatred for travel and doing stuff).

Seriously, I can't even say which one is my favorite -- not having a TV, expensive sandwiches, The Daily Show, having two last names -- they're all spot on. This site captures perfectly all the douchy things that people do. I love it.

Posted by: Sarah at 03:29 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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I've been seeing Subway commercials about how Jared has kept the weight off for ten years. Dang, there are kids out there who have never known a world without Jared.

Posted by: Sarah at 09:46 AM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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1 I just saw a subway commercial about that this morning! By the way, this is my first time visiting your blog. I like it! Your blog title takes me back to high school English - we read Stranger in a Strange Land. I assume you're a fan of it?

Posted by: Tootie at February 28, 2008 11:16 AM (e5c2s)

2 I actually got a sandwich at Subway for lunch, came home, got on the computer, and read your post...10 years of Jared? Wow.

Posted by: Nicole at February 28, 2008 09:01 PM (YHVU/)

3 Isnt it amazing? I was just thinking about that the other when I saw one of his commercials. What was the world like without Jared?

Posted by: lea at February 29, 2008 03:05 AM (NJQf+)

4 The best decision Jared ever made was stopping in a subway, wasnt it.

Posted by: Keri at February 29, 2008 05:15 AM (HXpRG)

5 Okay, I'm officially old. I was in college with Jared when he first started with the commercials--walked past his apartment everyday (he lived above a Subway store, IIRC).

Posted by: FbL at February 29, 2008 02:42 PM (rW1/8)

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I heard this morning on the radio that John McCain wanted to use the song "Take a Chance On Me" for his campaign, but ABBA put the kibosh on it. I just told my husband that, and he said, "I wouldn't use a song written by Swedes. What he needs is some AC/DC, maybe 'Highway to Hell.' No, wait, 'Hells Bells" and John McCain can say 'I'll come and choke you if you don't vote for me.'" Hahaha.

Posted by: Sarah at 02:53 PM | Comments (7) | Add Comment
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MSN rated the top 10 movie kisses. They went with Brokeback, of course. But if they had to choose a guy-to-guy kiss, why not Parker and Stone in BASEketball? Heh.

Posted by: Sarah at 04:50 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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(This is my favorite Valentine's Day tradition; I now think this is one of the most romantic songs ever. See here if you don't get the joke. And yes, I know I'm weird.)

See also: another favorite Valentine's Day tradition.

Posted by: Sarah at 03:28 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Marketing Lithuania: How about name change?
Officials say they may seek something easier to pronounce in English

Might I suggest Awesomestan? Or woo the young crowd with Republic of McLovin.

The ridiculousness just writes itself.

Posted by: Sarah at 11:07 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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1 HA! Awesomestan, Republic of McLovin! Excellent.

Posted by: Butterfly Wife at January 26, 2008 05:40 PM (K0acE)

2 Unpronouncilvania! Then we'll have someplace to use when that Egyptian town can't be mentioned.

Posted by: Ted at January 27, 2008 07:56 AM (yRolC)

3 Americans have trouble with Arkansas.

Posted by: David Boxenhorn at January 28, 2008 01:21 AM (LKLcc)

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My husband and I were trying to figure out how we could put our "stimulus refund" to good use while still showing our contempt for it.
Eureka: we're buying a handgun.

Posted by: Sarah at 07:04 AM | Comments (8) | Add Comment
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1 Ha! We'll probably buy him an ACOG for his rifle, because he's not being issued one. I'm equally contempuous of the "stimulus refund".

Posted by: Sis B at January 25, 2008 07:09 AM (uahf1)

2 Weird. This is what we were just talking about the other day. Won't help the economy much, but we can support one of the more ailing amendments. =) Sig

Posted by: Sig at January 25, 2008 07:35 AM (815Xj)

3 Sounds like a perfectly reasonable purchase to me

Posted by: Ann M. at January 25, 2008 07:54 AM (HFUBt)

4 bwwwah!!!

Posted by: awtm at January 25, 2008 10:01 AM (b8z4b)

5 Sounds good. However, I've heard that even if Pres. Bush signs the Bill next week, nobody will see the cash until August. Anyways, even if you don't like the idea, just spend it, spend it all. Give it to the wounded warriors project, the injured marine semper fi fund, whatever... My 2 cents.

Posted by: tim at January 25, 2008 11:12 AM (nno0f)

6 Great idea! Mine won't be spent...it's off to savings.

Posted by: Vonn at January 25, 2008 11:45 AM (L56+J)

7 I could expect NO less!!! DO NOT (I repeat, DO NOT) tell my husband..........he'll do the same.....

Posted by: debey at January 26, 2008 10:13 AM (83TNL)

8 I mentioned your idea to my wife, and she's seriously considering it! Thanks for the idea.

Posted by: Ted at January 27, 2008 08:04 AM (yRolC)

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I looked smart today, thanks to AWTM.
Someone actually asked me if I knew that Nebraska has a unicameral legislative system.
I stared at her incredulously for a moment before replying, "Actually, I just learned that the other day."
Thanks to AWTM...

No, seriously, that really happened today.

UPDATE:

Sorry, Tim, I fixed the link!

Posted by: Sarah at 08:33 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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My husband's miserly ways are notorious. AirForceWife even bought us a baby bib that says IRS Deduction. It's so true. When I asked him what he wanted for Christmas this year, he suggested I find some things around the house to sell for cash. He wants less stuff, not more; I can't remember the last time my husband has wanted to buy something for himself.

We came across these conversation cards this morning, little cards with questions to get conversations started. I flipped through them and realized I know my husband well enough to answer most of the questions for him. But I came to one that I wasn't sure of, so I asked him, "Given a choice, would you choose a mountain view, lake view, or ocean view?" He promptly answered, "Ocean view. Higher property values, I could sell it for more." My husband doesn't have a dream house, only a house he can sell.

That man cracks me up.

Posted by: Sarah at 05:01 AM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
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Break out the Jim Beam, honey, it's party time!

A few drinks during pregnancy might be OK
Occasional binge may not harm fetus; more study needed, researchers say

I'm kidding, before anyone freaks out. I don't think the occasional drink while you're pregnant is going to harm the baby -- no one ever told my mom not to drink while she was pregnant, so she had margaritas with dinner on occasion -- but I also have been trying to only do what's absolutely necessary in terms of medicine and stuff, especially during these first three months. And since I honestly have lost the craving for alcohol, it's not much of a sacrifice to not drink. Especially to not binge. Geez, who needs five drinks in one sitting while pregnant?

Posted by: Sarah at 06:40 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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OK, this MSNBC article has to be a joke:
Sex and marriage with robots? It could happen

They already did this joke on Futurama, with the public service announcement called I Dated a Robot. (I love that clip...hilarious.) "All civilization was just an effort to impress the opposite sex."

Don't Date Robots!

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From the article Inconvenient Youths:

In households across the country, kids are going after their parents for environmental offenses, from using plastic cups to serving non-grass-fed beef at the dinner table. Many of these kids are getting more explicit messages about becoming eco-warriors at school and from popular books and movies.

This year’s global-warming documentary “Arctic Tale,” for instance, closes with a child actor telling kids, “If your mom and dad buy a hybrid car, you’ll make it easier for polar bears to get around.”

From the comments section at Hot Air:

And I’m telling my kids, “If we buy a big enough SUV, we can fit a couple polar bears inside it and make it really easy for them to get around!”

Seriously though, that article was annoying as all get-out.

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