November 17, 2008
I am not funny.
I sit on the funny panel at SpouseBUZZ Live and hate everything that comes out of my mouth. I am like Chris Farley in those old SNL skits -- "Idiot! I'm so stupid!" -- after everything I say. I don't like being funny. My peeps bring teh funny, not me.
And I don't do impressions. I don't even have a Cartman or a Slingblade. I can't do it.
So who knew that I would crack AWTM up.
With apologies to Rachel Lucas for stealing her line, they need to legalize gay marriage so that Kristen Wiig can be my wife.
This is for you, AWTM.
Every time we go to one of these SBL weekends, someone will ask me what I did. Did you see the Space Needle, Did you see the Alamo? I don't seem to be able to explain that the only thing I care about is being with my friends. In the swank Hotel Murano or the ghetto fabulous Sahara, I just want to be in my gulch.
These people, we grok each other.
November 05, 2008
And John McCain was quite funny, especially the campaign strategies. He should just show up on SNL periodically; he always makes me laugh on that show.
Â“A new President has been elected. Well that aught to teach himÂ…Â”
The Office of the Presidency is a cruel inhumane joke that we invented to trap our most agressive alpha males. They get attracted to the scent of power, and the find themselves trapped in the steel jaws of a governmental system thats designed on purpose to not work.
That's why everyone comes into the office of the President loks like a bright shiny penny and leaves the office looking like a bag of freshly hammered dog crap.
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