December 15, 2004

HEH

And because we all could use a laugh, here's a joke from Oda Mae:

A Baptist minister was seated next to a Marine on a commercial airline flight. After the plane was airborne, drink orders were taken.

The Marine asked for a scotch and soda, which was promptly placed before him. The flight attendant then asked the minister if he would like a drink.

The minister replied in disgust, "I'd rather be savagely raped by brazen whores than let liquor touch my lips."

The Marine handed his drink back to the attendant and said, "Me too. I didn't know that was a choice."

Posted by: Sarah at 09:47 AM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
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December 07, 2004

JOB PERKS

OK, so I agreed to work tomorrow since my co-worker had already made a doctor appointment. Unfortunately, I had put off a bunch of things that I intended to do tomorrow, like grade papers, shop for a gift for my Czech orphan, knit an entire hat and scarf as a gift, wrap and send my Christmas presents home, and grade more papers. So now I'm a little stressed that I had planned all these things for tomorrow and I will be sitting at work instead. (If you hadn't figured it out by now, I stress out easily.) Thus I had the following hilarious exchange with my husband online tonight:

Sarah: usch, do you ever feel job stress?
Sarah: dumb question, right?
Husband: umm...a little I guess
Husband: why?
Sarah: but like when you guys have a lot to do, does your stomach feel like you're gonna throw up?
Sarah: cuz that's how I feel this week
Husband: not really
Husband: but if people make me real mad at work I get to shoot them

Man, I love that guy.

Posted by: Sarah at 03:48 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
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December 05, 2004

HEH

Family members love each other, but they often disagree. I've seen many stories from parents who don't respect the military wishes of their child, but here's the story of a daughter whose beliefs don't jive with her father's. It just gave me a little smile.

Posted by: Sarah at 04:13 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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November 29, 2004

WOW

Wow. Someone with WAY too much time on his hands wrote a long and boring pro-Chomsky rant on one of my really old posts. I imagine this guy googled Chomsky stuff and then bombed everyone who had said anything bad about Chomsky. The funny thing is that the post was only somewhat related to Chomsky. Oh, I could have said bad stuff, since his linguistics is garbage and his politics is hilarious, but I didn't say anything about him in this post. Go ye and be bored silly: Logic and Reasoning: Inside the Mind of an anti-Chomskyite: The Play (Act 1)

Posted by: Sarah at 01:45 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
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November 22, 2004

MOVIE

CavX found a parody of Fahrencrap 9/11. It's a lengthy clip, and you get the joke after a couple of minutes, but it's worth checking out. I loved the Wal-Mart scene.

Fellowship 9/11

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November 21, 2004

IN A NUTSHELL

I got a hilarious email from a friend who watched Smallville for the first time because of me:

PS: I finally saw Smallville for the first time tonight. Except for the names, it has nothing to do with the Superman comics whatsoever. I already knew that, but it helps to confirm it. The Chloe character is totally original. I didn't "get" the show. Do all the episodes follow this formula?

- Kryptonite causes something to happen
- Clark resolves it

If you're a Smallville fan too, you'll know just how hilarious that summary is. Pretty much yes, but that's part of its charm.

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October 22, 2004

BONKERS

Everything about this article, even the title, cracked me up.
Polite society anticipates Teresa's pizazz

(via my husband...we had a great time laughing at the article over IM)

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October 20, 2004

YUCK

My husband just pointed out this new Onion article.
He wasn't that amused. "I get the parody," he said, "but it's a little sensitive for me."
I thought it was in appallingly bad taste.

Posted by: Sarah at 12:27 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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October 19, 2004

HEH

Is it just me, or does this look like it could be the cover of an REM album?

Posted by: Sarah at 03:59 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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October 18, 2004

WEIRD

I went to Poland on Saturday. At one store, they were selling commemorative plates with George Bush and John Kerry on them, for some bizarre reason. One of them will be worth bupkis in a few weeks.

We also had a comical moment when we tried to go to a Polish grocery store. Apparently you can't go into the store carrying any bags, because a security guard came chasing after us as soon as we walked in. As he barked at us, we looked at him and said, "English? Deutsch?" Apparently he didn't speak either, but he decided to help us out by speaking in v-e-r-y slow Polish. Ha.

Posted by: Sarah at 07:15 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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October 15, 2004

SARAH

My friend just emailed me and pointed out that one of the Team America characters is named Sarah.
Excellent. Thank you, Matt and Trey!

Posted by: Sarah at 04:08 AM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
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October 14, 2004

HA

The digs on everybody had me laughing on the Onion this week. Especially John Edward's enthusiasm. (Thanks, fad)

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October 10, 2004

GREEN WITH ENVY

Oh MAN am I jealous! Hud got to see Team America! Many soldiers down in Iraq have been going nuts buying bootleg DVDs, but my husband and I haven't gotten into that. However, I told him that he must buy Team America if he sees it because I'm afraid I might not see it here otherwise. Of course I'll buy the official copy when it comes out, since I'm a firm believer in putting as much money as possible into Parker and Stone's pockets, but I don't want to have to wait until next year to see it. I can barely wait as it is!

Posted by: Sarah at 03:53 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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October 05, 2004

STUCK

OK, now THIS was definitely the laugh I needed today.
Those poor guys!

And this was freaking funny too.

(both via Iraq Now)

Posted by: Sarah at 09:46 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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BINGO

Now this game is really funny! I wish I had found this before I watched the debate rerun. (Make sure to check out all four pages!)

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September 30, 2004

MOCKING

fad had me laughing out loud. At work. Big guffaws.
Go check out this post, where he announces his intention to become a big-time blogger, and then start scrolling up.
You know you spend too much time at the computer when you recognize everyone he's mocking.

Posted by: Sarah at 10:29 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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September 16, 2004

HA

One Iranian boy had the same reaction that I did to Fahrencrap 9/11: "I was bored from the middle, and I wished we had gone to see "Kill Bill" instead."

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September 10, 2004

LONGING

You know what I want? More people in my immediate day-to-day life who would laugh at an off-the-cuff Micah Wright reference. Heck, I can't even get away with a Jayson Blair joke in class without my students looking at me blankly. I'd kill to have one person walk into my office and say, "Oh, you're reading blogs?" Sigh.

Posted by: Sarah at 10:42 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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MEMOS

My mom and I got sick yesterday. I went in to work but had to leave early, and I'm playing hooky today too. Actually, it's not so much "playing hooky", seeing as I feel like I could die. What a vacation, huh? But I can't sleep any more -- I have slept 11 hours already -- so I'm reading blogs in between getting sick.

So I hear this morning there are some fake memos floating around? (in my best Ace Ventura voice) Reeeeally? Blame Bush! has copies of the memos, and I don't see how anyone could have fallen for them in the first place.

Laughing seriously hurts today.

MORE TO GROK:

See also Scrappleface and Puce for good parodies.

Posted by: Sarah at 03:31 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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COLLECT UNDERPANTS

Deskmerc brings to mind the Underpants Gnomes from South Park:

Gnome 2: Phase I we collect underpants.
Gnome 1: Ya, ya, ya. But what about Phase II?
[Silence]
Gnome 2: Well Phase III is profit. Get it?

Posted by: Sarah at 03:19 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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