PAST AND PRESENT
Erin just recounted
an interesting story: a girl she went to high school with contacted her via MySpace...and this girl is now a boy. Hmmm.
Leaving completely aside the issue of transgenderism, I started to think how bold it was of this person to contact Erin. Seems to me it might be awful hard to reach out to people you went to high school with and tell them you've changed genders. Not bumping into them in the grocery store and having to explain yourself, but actively reaching out and seeing if people accept you. Wow. Made me feel pretty silly to be scared of letting people in on my blog.
So thanks to Erin's friend for bashing me over the head with perspective. And best of luck to him as he tries to mesh his old life with his new one.
Posted by: Sarah at
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I had that exact experience, but I didn't get stared at in class.
Posted by: Green at August 31, 2007 01:34 PM (VqW06)
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Aww. That's so nice of you, Sarah.
I must admit I wasn't quite as accepting and understanding as you when I first found out the news. I'm fairly accepting of lifestyles that may be considered "sinful" to some, but this one really threw me for a loop. And maybe it's because I can't grasp the concept of literally wanting to live as a man. Yeah, I talk about how cool it would be to pee standing up, and I love guns and hunting. And I like football and beer, which are all stereotyped as "man things." But I really can't imagine wanting to be a gender other than my own. It really does perplex me. I don't grok transgenderism.
Posted by: Erin at August 31, 2007 05:31 PM (XRza7)
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At an all-girl college not too far from here, there is exactly one male registered, who has begun the process of changing from female to male. As far as I can tell, he's unconditionally accepted as is by the other students, which I think is wonderful.
Erin, I agree with you about not grokking transgenderism. But from reading about transgender issues online, I gather that means that we are the right sex inside the right body type. Someone doesn't just decide to change sex because they'd rather be the other, it's more like a woman decides to change her body in the male form because her brain is male. She thinks like a male, feels like a male, sees herself as male, etc. It's adjusting the outer shell to what it should have been all along. Male to female works the same way, just in reverse.
A.E. Brain (on my blogroll) is going through the process now in Australia. Zoe - used to be Alan - writes about the process, the mental health issues, the problems with family, society, and all that. Very intelligent writing and very informative. Zoe has embraced her change, although nature "forced her hand" so to speak. She's a walking medical textbook study since her body more or less spontaneously began the hormonal adjustments a few years ago. She began to change, and it took doctors several months to figure out just what it was that was going on. Her body did on its own in less than a year what most have to do with medication over several years.
She's post-op now, dealing with red tape and an unbelievable amount of government nonsense. Like I said, if you're at all interested, it's a great place to learn about it from someone who's been there.
Posted by: Ted at September 01, 2007 03:10 AM (yRolC)
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Sorry to be negative but I feel I have to add - there is a huge movement right now in the US that is not based on 'gender identity disfunction' as Ted describes above, but is about 'smashing the gender binary', far more political, by extreme feminists (mostly lesbians, but not always), often in the punk scene, that are transitioning from f to m. My daughter (25) was involved with them for awhile and dated one for a few months, so I heard and read a lot about it. They reject the concept of there being 2 genders (thus 'smashing the gender binary") and see gender as a fluid and evolving thing. Some of them live between genders, identifying as neither, some have surgery and/or hormone therapy, and many others just bind their breasts flat, take a male name and live as a male. The whole thing was very political and much more of a movement than people suffering and struggling with a serious problem. They seemed like very troubled and unhappy people and I was glad when my daughter's life moved in a different direction. Your friend may or may not be part of this movement, but I thought it was worth adding that this is going on. If you google transgender or any term like that, you will see a lot of these highly political sites as well, as it is a very current thing in the larger cities now. So, sadly, I don't see it as brave necessarily, as much as another issue to be an activist about. Of course the person in question in the post may not be part of this movement at all. Just adding my experience....
Posted by: Amy at September 01, 2007 05:51 AM (I9LMv)
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Amy -- Point well taken. I have no experience with anything like this before, so I'm probably quite naive about the whole thing.
Posted by: Sarah at September 01, 2007 07:26 AM (TWet1)
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Yeah I was too, until my daughter got involved in this subculture. I was so shaken up that I went back to see the counselor we had seen a few times when she had had some earlier problems. The counselor wasn't familiar with it either. I had to say "Would you read these websites before our meeting?" and she did and said she learned a lot! Anyway, her advice was to wait it out and my daughter would find that world too limiting and move on, which is exactly what happened. But I did learn more than I wanted to know about it along the way!
Posted by: Amy at September 02, 2007 12:49 PM (I9LMv)
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HE FILLS GAPS
Leela: "Fry, this isn't TV. It's real life. Can't you tell the difference?"
Fry: "Sure. I just like TV better.
I'm always fascinated by our modern-day tales and legends, by the fictional characters we hold up as our inspiration for greatness. Sadly when I write about this, I often get insulted by people who think that I can't tell the difference between a TV character and a real person. But apparently a Serbian village is looking for inspiration in our modern-day heroes as well:
A Serbian village is hoping to channel some of Rocky BalboaÂ’s fighting spirit with a 10-foot-tall statue of the fictional boxer portrayed by actor Sylvester Stallone.
...
Zitiste has repeatedly suffered flooding and landslides, gaining a disaster-prone reputation. Fed up, the locals contemplated how to change that image and revive the village — one of the poorest in northern Serbia — and came up with the idea of a statue of the tenacious fictional fighter.
I think that's pretty cool. If we have to be a cultural hegemon, at least we're exporting Rocky.
Posted by: Sarah at
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IIRC, there's a statue honoring Gojira in a park in Tokyo.
Posted by: Patrick Chester at August 22, 2007 01:56 PM (MKaa5)
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I personally like exporting Elvis. He WAS the king, you know.
Posted by: airforcewife at August 22, 2007 04:31 PM (emgKQ)
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Maybe it's because we don't seem actively to value a life of character as much as we did in the past that we don't have quite as many "real-life 'heros' "? That said, though, I think we've always had TALES of heroic deeds and lives of great character that we've told and re-told, just to give us something to shoot for. . . to aspire to.
I love the scene in the Lord of the Rings where Frodo and Sam are walking along, having a light moment imagining the other in subsequent folklore and the kids clamoring for Dad to tell it one more time - about Frodo the brave, and Sam-wise the faithful. . . .
I guess we take what inspiration we can find, wherever we find it. And I hope you're not insulted for what you wrote this time, Sarah! For all you nay-sayers, I look up to Sam-wise, the non-existent, mythical Hobbit. So there. For courage, perseverence, faithfulness, selflessness, and getting the job done, he's hard to beat.
Maybe that's a more important question: WHAT do we admire in our heroes? (real or fictional) And why?
Posted by: prophet at August 22, 2007 06:31 PM (Yagmr)
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UM, IT'S ON
Folks, something I feel passionate about has come up, and a major fisking is in order. And someone named Monica needs a
pimp slap.
In the swampy soup of hopefuls for the 2008 presidential election, there is a man with a funny name. (No, not that one.)
We're thinking of the one named Fred (Thompson).
Say it out loud. Do it. Fred. Fred. In the South, Fray-ud.
Fur-red-duh.
It has the tonal quality of something being dropped on the floor, something heavy and damp-ish.
Waterlogged paper towel.
Fred.
Ahem. Some of you may remember that I have a megacrush on every man on the planet named Fred. Yes, including this one. And the idea that we could have a Fred for president has indeed happily crossed my mind. So this Monica hooch better realize that she's walkin' on the flightin' side of me with this crappy-ass article.
London's Sunday Times last month interviewed a bevy of his ex-girlfriends, all of whom have drunk the Fred-Aid: "He's majestic," said country singer/Fredophile Lorrie Morgan. "Women love a soft place to lay and a strong pair of hands to hold us."
Fred?
Why? Is there something about the craggy actor we're not getting? Maybe he's ugly-sexy, like Mick Jagger?
Or maybe the name Fred is etymologically close to obviously sexy names like Dirk, Clint, James?
Grant Smith is an onomastician at Eastern Washington University in Cheney, who studies the branch of linguistics dedicated to proper names. He specializes in dissecting the monikers of political candidates and says he has a 65 percent success rate of predicting elections, based solely on name analysis. Not entirely convincing, but those odds would play in Vegas. "The name Fred is basic and homey," says Smith. "It should give people a reassuring image."
But is it, Dr. Smith, a sexy name?
Silence.
"I would not say that. The name Fred does not suggest blatant sexuality at all."
Speak for yourself, dude.
At the Fredquarters of the Fred Society in Palm Springs, Calif., "Head Fred" Fred Daniel has been defending his good name against charges of boringness and dolt-itude for 23 years. Daniel, 52, founded the society in 1984 by combing the Los Angeles phone book for Freds and sending out a 500-person mailing. There are 5,000 Freds in the organization now, but Daniel must fight for every member. "Unfortunately, Fred has fast fallen out of favor," he laments. From 1885 to 1896, it was the 15th-most-popular boy's baby name. But the last time Fred appeared in the top 1,000 was 2002.
Be still, my heart, there's a Fredquarters.
Fred.
We are trying to understand.
We are willing to admit that that some people find Fred Thompson, yes, sexy.
But we still cannot understand what that means.
What does it signify that we, as a country, are choosing to deem yummy a guy named Fred?
It signifies that you are a huge bitch for writing a 1000-word article making fun of a man for his name. His delicious, perfect name.
Seriously, this is journalism? This sounds like something my brother's basketball team would've come up with to rip on someone while playing X-box. How on earth did this ever get published? Maybe Monica's next article can be about how Giuliani will never be taken seriously because he has the same name as the little football player who could. Or how Mitt is something you use to take cakes out of the oven.
Good lord, journalists are lame. Lamer than any Fred I've ever met.
Posted by: Sarah at
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I finally got a chance to go read her "article". Of course making fun of names and how people look is often what "journalists" do when they have nothing of substance to write.
I don't even like it when they write an entire article about what Hillary is wearing. We aren't electing her clothes to public office - and since she doesn't dress in rags... who cares.
Posted by: Teresa at August 14, 2007 03:18 AM (gsbs5)
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"On Urbandictionary.com, a "Fred" is defined as "a person who does stupid, annoying, or idiotic things" (Fred Flintstone, Fred Mertz). The best-case descriptors a Fred can hope for are terms like well-intentioned, predictable, benign (Fred Rogers)."
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=monica
Posted by: David Boxenhorn at August 14, 2007 09:38 PM (LKLcc)
Posted by: Sarah at August 15, 2007 02:26 AM (TWet1)
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