December 22, 2011

WHERE WE GO FROM HERE

My bloodwork yesterday, along with past personal experience, indicates that my body is still very much pregnant, despite the fact that no baby is growing in the yolk sac.

So I get to spend the Christmas weekend still morning sick, and then I get to take the miscarriage meds and spend the New Years weekend in pain.

Happy Holidays.

My new doctor suspects that there might be more at play than just my translocation.  The two genetic counselors I've spoken with seem to think that might be possible as well.

I might be lucky enough to have TWO forms of infertility.

Three tails, a heads, and three more tails is within the realm of possibility...but it's much more lousy than the predictive models say it ought to be.  I have spent the past five months cursing the name of the woman who created the predictive models.  She has been contacted with my "real world data" to see if she can explain it.

The new doctor also wants to run some more tests soon to check for other factors that can cause blighted ova, to see if something else is happening.

I need to get more math and science focused because I have started to feel a little nutty.  I don't normally believe in superstition, but I'm starting to think goofy thoughts like "Every ultrasound my husband has ever attended has been a dead baby.  He's the jinx; maybe I should leave him at home next time."

And in case you've ever wondered, rum makes morning sickness worse.

Posted by: Sarah at 06:47 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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1 If I knew of the right words I would say them.  It is a comfort when you and Mr Grok can share your gallows humor with each other, but it is just heartbreaking to hear yet more heartache.  If there is more testing and knowledge that can help and keep your brain focused on something other than the emotional/mental roller coaster - I hope it leads to another miracle as soon as possible.  You are a great mama.  

Posted by: wifeunit at December 23, 2011 11:18 PM (LHZib)

2 That makes sense.  It would be a lot more fun to have a real baby than to have a new science paper written on your problem.  I am glad they are researching it. Probabilities are actually the pits.
In spite of all you  have a wonderful child, a wonderful marriage and a wonderful attitude.  I don't know how you do it.  I would be so spiteful and hateful by now NO ONE would be able to stand me.
Still and all, have as good a Christmas as possible.
And give Charlotte a hug from me.

Posted by: Ruth H at December 24, 2011 02:48 PM (JFseb)

3 Of course rum makes you sick in the morning.  Gin is for mornings, or Baileys AND Kahilua in the coffee, rum is for after 11 AM.

Stop taking medical advice from your bartender.  All good medical advice comes from the internets.

Posted by: Chuck at December 27, 2011 02:04 PM (e6YDg)

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